Matt's Blog: Classic Age of the Bros

This is the second entry of Matt's Blog, written by Elias Rex main character Matt. It was retrived from Matt's Site here.

Classic Age of the Bros
You are as now viewing the ancient cave the Bros used to live in. 20,000,000,000 years ago, the very first Bros of the Bro Species have appeared. The dinosaurs, were angry because of one thing, they couldn 't masturbate no I'm just kidding they were too big for big hands. The Bros started back 20,000,000,000 years ago, when they have started building caves, and found fire, food and supplies. Resources granted them awesome things. The word awesome became an official word, along with ultimate and legendary. Then the Bros found a thing called classic ages in which the very first Bro Species,  Homo erectus (indeed) disappeared. The classical Greek ages led them to a big fight (I don' t remember what it was about) with the new empire called Roman empire. They started splitting into kingdoms, with Romans on Europe and Greek on half of Europe. Egyptians then also invaded both of those countries, along with Macedonia, who sided with Greece, and Persia, who was such a puss like always.

The Greek Bros found physics, also they found Greek yogurt, which is really yummy. Around the time Greeks ended the invasion of Egypt and Rome, they started siding with Macedonia and Persia, although Persia was just a puss like always.

Greece later found Zeus, an awesome god. The Romans found Jupiter, the name of the god which Jupiter was named after. Poor people, they didn't have awesome powers like we do, and didn't have awesome people. Greece found it's legendary empire, which became a strong competitor to other countries like Rome and Egypt. Of course, Germany later was founded and sided with Greece. This broke the Broship between Greece and Macedonia, ending their siding.

The Bros found that the classic age really did suck, too many blood ass spilled corpses, and not so many women around, I'm kidding. So, let's list our few moments of awesomeness, oh wait everyone died. We all our now happy with the modern, informational age.

We will later move on to the medieval age, and soon enough we will find history like it is. Bros, follow our leaders blog (not active but still accessible) and don't forget to find the rules of becoming a Bro who will master losers.

The Bros don't stop!

Notes and Trivia

 * This is the first fake history lesson Matt wrote. Apparently, he stated that only Greeks and Romans were the ones who first started fight, although many more countries (Macedonia, Persia and Egypt) started war before.